The Mess

 

for Kevin

 

This time we'll catch what we're after.

We can catch what you choose –

And take too many on one line,

All dark flat muscle –

The lake at Grosvenor raging with fins –

The whole sharp‑skinned mess twining.

 

For breakfast we'll brown old days in the pan

Like that bass Dad mashed in butter,

Fry them whole at lunch like the Greek sailors

Unfolding their weighted green lines

Straight down off thick cork cards,

Relishing the guts and the eyes,

Their tongues rooting the flesh from bone.

 

It won't be like last time,

Going alone, when we dumped our bait

And brown blood stained the cove,

The day I tried to make it easy for us:

No casting, no waiting,

No posing over shallow water

Reflecting up our fishing crowns.

 

We would feed the fish and head home.

We couldn't be forever banging squid

On the hull like angry schoolteachers,

Or squinting, trigger‑fingering the weight

While the fish gape limpeyed at the barb.

 

I'm waiting to hear Dad at the door:

Wake up, let's move it.

 I want to show you it's over,

But sometimes it still comes back –

On my back in the dark, waiting

Again for a season, the right one.

The one I slept through, and woke up taller.